Ho Chi Minh City

In the morning we begin an eight-hour long bus journey to Ho Chi Minh City, previously known as Saigon and still known as Saigon for the majority of the people in and out of the city. The road from Chau Doc to Saigon is pleasant after the Cambodia’s rocky roads, but travelling is slow because of the massive amount of traffic. There are currently 85 million people and more than 35 million motorcycles in Vietnam and after four hours in the bus I feel I have seen them all – at least twice. I even witness a road accident – surprisingly the first one I have seen (counting out the random kerb hitting tuk-tuk ride in Phnom Penh I participated in). The accident is one big mess of people, scooters, triangular shaped hats and sandals spread across the motorway. But on and on we go. We take ferries on two different occasion which give us short breaks from the bus and a bit of fresh breeze.

I quickly realise that the mental visual image I have had of Vietnam is completely made of American films, with the popular quotes such as “Good morning Vietnam!” and “I love the smell of napalm in the morning”. Platoon, Apocalypse now, Full Metal Jacket, Good morning Vietnam, Forrest Gump… The reality feels very different: I see several colourful wedding ceremonies in the road side restaurants, multi-coloured flags, adverts (every other one sign says Honda. I learn Honda has turned to mean any scooter or scooter related item or service in Vietnamese. Talking about successful branding there). I see thousands of coloured scooter helmets, it is compulsory to wear a helmet in Vietnam – they had 13 000 lethal scooter accidents only last year. The traffic outside the bus is one chaotic and merry party. Everyone uses the horn to signal where they are going. It sure does get loud.

I watch the driver doing some interesting hand gestures for few hours, before I dare to ask the tour guide what they mean. So, if you ever have to drive in Vietnam (which I definately wouldn’t recommend), make sure you know how to:

Gesture 1: Hold your arm forward, spread your fingers like holding an invisible tennis ball

Meaning 1: “No police where I come from – you can keep on driving faster than the speed limit allows”

Gesture 2: Hold your arm to the right side of the road like you were pointing out something in the kerb

Meaning 2: “A police patrol where I came from, slow down to a legal speed limit”

Gesture 3: Pointing your thumb backwards over your shoulder

Meaning 3: “Police is following on my trails.”

I didn’t see the driver doing the third gesture the guide taught me. It would be funny if we had been chased, though. Maybe next time. I check from the tour guide that in few days we will be driving the highway one – that is meant to be the busiest and most dangerous of the motorways of Vietnam. Even this one we are driving is more than enough, I wouldn’t want to drive here.

We reach Ho Chi Minh City in the evening and I get a room, which is more of a dungeon than a room. There is a window, but it leads to dark narrow corridor between the buildings. When I look upwards, I only see steel bars blocking people from entering or getting out – in case of fire I am in a death trap. Cool. No natural light for the next two days in the room.

As a nerd I am positively surprised that this hotel also has a wi-fi. But to my disappointment, it is not working in this hotel either. “Internet is broken” tells the receptionist. I wonder if anyone is repairing teh Interweb of Vietnam.

This evening is the last evening of the first part of the tour. Our Cambodian guide will return to Bangkok tomorrow to start a new tour and the new Vietnamese tour guide will begin her work tomorrow. Five of the twelve of us will continue the trip all the way to Hanoi and seven will finish in Ho Chi Minh city and continue to their separate adventures. We have our last meal together and say farewells. This was my first ever tour and I have enjoyed every moment of it.